Inspiration
Don't Suck

Don’t Suck

I don’t actually know who is supposed to hate whom. Admittedly, I paid VERY little attention in high school when discussing political discord, warring nations, differing religions… not because I was lazy but because none of those things made any difference to me – AT ALL. The less I knew about who is supposed to...
Community

Community

I got a lesson in ‘community’ today. As I was painting feverishly at the arts center a man knocked on the window and mouthed, “Do you need some help?” I stupidly mouthed back, ‘That’s OK.” – not wanting to impose. Thank goodness he didn’t give up. He said, “I can paint!” Finally realizing that I...
Do New

Do New

I did something new last night. I sang Christmas songs (seriously) – IN PUBLIC. Two things people who know me would say I would NEVER do: #1 – ‘seriously’ sing, or #2 – sing Christmas songs (seriously or otherwise). I credit my friends. I do things because I demand so much of them. They are SOOOO talented....
Train Wreck

Train Wreck

So, I’m a wreck. And it’s all your fault. I am sitting in my living room, getting ready for tomorrow, staring at a pile of photographs, and watching bids come in on pieces I’ve painted. I NEVER, EVER, in a million years thought I’d sell a painting – paint them, yeah, give them away as...
Jump

Jump

I burned the pasta today. Dane slid off of the ottoman and bumped his head on the stone hearth while I was trying to change him. I’m not OK. I’m not dead in the water, but I’m not OK. I’m definitely distracted. Full disclosure: Jay – is – stressed. I don’t blame him. He has...
Called

Called

I hated kids – when I was one. I never babysat, because they hated me back. I had no idea that they would save me one day… but they did. I’m struggling with today. I am struggling to admit that I’m human, much less American, Midwestern, Pennsylvanian… It’s never made any difference to me AT...
I Love My Ma!

I Love My Ma!

Be sure that I love my Mama. I am searching for my birth family NOT because I am lacking anything in regards to the family who chose to raise me, but because I choose to seek the total truth. That is who I am. You can agree or disagree, but that is who I am....
Inside Out

Inside Out

I haven’t written in awhile – well true stuff anyway. I actually wrote an entire play in three days about what I think meeting my birth mom will be like but that’s another story… There’s a reason for that. I haven’t been myself lately. At least I don’t think so. I am waiting on confirmation...
Family

Family

“…let your mom and sister know that they are family to us now too. If they want to come “home” with you, I want them to know they are welcome. Them being your family connects them to us as surely as your DNA does. It’s not a game of tug of war to see which...
Ready, Set, Search!

Ready, Set, Search!

I almost killed my husband a few nights ago. Venom spewed from my lips as I hissed that I hated him. Jason stared at me in complete disbelief. Seething, I stared right back. So much has happened in just a couple of weeks. I am an emotional mess who should apologize to my family and...
Anyone Want to Start a School?

Anyone Want to Start a School?

Every year, about this time, I wander around the house, void of common sense, unable to successfully fake socially acceptable behavior or remotely control my emotions in any way. I dread the first day of school for many, many reasons. Let’s be honest. My children are not ‘normal’ by any stretch of the imagination. I...
I'm NOT Going to Hell

I’m NOT Going to Hell

I’m not going to hell. I’m not. I was raised Catholic and taught that if I was cremated I would go to hell. I AM going to be cremated – in fact, I heard you can become an actual ‘firework’ and that sounds pretty damn good to me. That’s how I see my last hoorah....