IMG_5783I went to the doctor‘s today.

No one in my family pressured me to go. Nothing was literally ‘falling off’, which is what a voluntary appointment (made by me) would have taken not so long ago. I just had a ‘feeling’ about a tick bite. I went, because as a mom, that’s what I need to do.

I haven’t gone to the doctor regularly since the boys were born. I haven’t taken my thyroid medication for… well, maybe 6 months, 9 months, a year… Truth is, I don’t know. Shame on me.

I’m turning 42 in a week and just scheduled my very first mammogram – and yes, my Mom-in-Law guilted me into that. Thank you Jen, for real.

Strangely, I saw a doctor today that I hadn’t met before. It was an ‘emergency’ visit so I took the doctor available.

I had had a bad day – a BAD day. I thought it was a good day, but, as life would have it, I was mistaken.

I’ve been ‘battling’ many wars as of late: wars with the school system, wars with friends, wars within my own family structure over decisions of enormous magnitude, wars inside my own crazy, restless, heavy mind…

When the nurse asked me if I had been experiencing any feelings of tiredness or exhaustion lately, I simply smiled and said, “Nothing I can’t handle”. She smiled back, punched a few keys on her keyboard and asked me to wait for the doctor.

The doctor came in.

She saw right through me. She read my face. She heard my heart – no, not just listened to it, she HEARD it. She asked me questions about things beyond ticks. She LISTENED.

I left feeling lighter, happier, relieved, understood…

Whether or not I test positive for Lyme’s disease, I walked in with ‘something’ and what I left with was something more.

Good doctors are caregivers.

And today, she saved me.