Nope. I don’t like to be alone.

Is that a crime???

Should I apologize for my need to be around the buzz of other humans? Should I feel like a lesser person because I draw energy from the energy around me? Is it wrong to be inspired by the simple sound of another person doing normal ‘person’ stuff?

As a single woman in her 40’s I keep hearing that I need to learn how to ‘be alone’. I shouldn’t be with someone else until I can be by myself. I can’t love someone else until I learn how to love myself… blah, blah, blah.

News flash – I LOVE MYSELF. Make absolutely NO mistake. I seriously, for realsy, love myself.

I dig where I am in life. Extreme change has happened as of late but I have embraced the change and made the absolute best of all things happening.

I am surrounded by art. ART. Art to me is friendship, spontaneity, travel, experience, paint spills, laughter, music, love, total chaos, messy counters, dishes undone, laundry piling up, success, failure…

I spent 20 minutes alone the other day. 20 WHOLE MINUTES. I had a panic attack. I had no idea what to do. I had a million things I could do but I simply, paralyzingly (yep, made that word up) just couldn’t. I stood up from my computer and turned to walk up the stairs to just lie down in bed. The only thing I felt I could do. I NEVER just lie down. EVER.

At that very moment my phone ‘dinged’. One of my most favorite people in the whole wide world messaged ‘Tell me you’re home!’

I was.

The universe clearly understands that it’s ok to need people. People people are a dying breed. I crave voices, faces, tears, joy… Yours or mine.

I’m going to keep on doing what I do best, loving life and living it best by experiencing it with the people and through the people around me.

Maybe one day I’ll take a vaca by myself, but I don’t see that happening any time soon!